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Feelings..nothing more than feelings!



I have never been able to really express it in words what it is like to go deep and really feel.  There is nothing wrong.  About three years ago Taylor and I got divorced.  Instead of putting the pictures away, I used our wedding video to practice feeling, because it was one of the happiest days of my life and I wanted it to stay that way.  I really did not want it to turn into something "bad".  Our whole relationship is a grand lesson and I loved every minute of it.   

So I learned to really feel without any fear of it.  I go deep and just experience all feelings at a deep level.  I learned by practicing that none of it hurt me, but made me a woman of depth.  I could hold more of the world in my heart. 

So what drove me nuts is when I would share and cry people would say things like "it will be ok", as If something was wrong.  I don't see duality, as right or wrong, good or bad, just is....just feelings.  So I would not share.  Recently on facebook I posted that I cried because Shane is moving to Guam.  Why would I not cry?  It's not tears of grief.  It's just feelings.  Of course.  Beautiful feelings.  He is flying!  Flying!  And mixed emotions run and play and run and play...and oh what a beautiful life, when I feel all of that.  But some people told me that it will be "ok".....and that still bothered me.  I guess it's because being vulnerable somehow means you are drowning.  Ugh!  Right...... 

I am so thankful for it all.   

Sharon 

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